Fancy weddings without the wealth to back them up are the ultimate exercise of narcissism and commercialism in modern Kenyan society. I have observed countless times that women in the 254 want to get married, but they do not want to be married.
What’s the difference?
Well, they want the year-long attention of being in “wedding planning mode,” culminating in the ultimate party where they are the supreme princess for the day. But when it comes to fulfilling a role as a wife and mother, they will suddenly balk at any mention of tradition.
A woman’s unilateral insistence upon a large wedding reflects especially poorly on her character in the following ways:
Financial Irresponsibility
The average Kenyan wedding costs Sh500,000 and above. The median Kenyan. household income is Sh50,000. For anyone besides the super-rich, how can throwing a big party to commemorate your financial castration be considered anything but irresponsible? Your woan would rather squander money (often much of it yours) on a lavish celebration rather than investments such as buying land, saving for retirement, or taking your children to good schools.
It is one-isided
Men don’t enjoy weddings at all. They just tolerate it in order to please their women. Though they make up half of a marriage partnership (and usually more financially-speaking), a preference for a courthouse or a small ceremony is almost always ignored because it’s “her special day.” This sets a poor precedent for future decisions you will make together. She will always be selfish and want you to do things for her
Herd mentality
A good number of women want to do a lavish wedding just because their friends or relatives did one. Society has taught girls from childhood that they deserve a grand storybook wedding full of jealous aunties, serial pilau eaters, and super excited mothers.
Her friends influence her more by showing off their expensive engagement rings that their fiancés took loans to buy. Her parents want to bring the entire extended family to the ceremony to show off their success at raising a well-adjusted beautiful and disciplined little girl.
It’s all pointless
So guys, If you’ve committed yourself to having a big wedding yet you don’t even make more than 100k a month, you’ve already made a tremendously risky move. If your fiance insists that you take loans, ask primary school friends for help, or dump a bunch of your hard-saving money into what amounts to a one-sided victory party, you know unequivocally that she will not make a good financial partner in the long run. Get out while you still can. Usiseme sikukushow