As I’m writing this, the world is still battling a pandemic. Because of this, many relationships are being pushed to the limit. Divorce lawyers across the globe are preparing for a dramatic increase in separations due to isolation measures.
Typically, this divorce lawyer’s dream comes after holidays, like Christmas and summer, due to the increased time together and the added stress family often bears. Looks like Christmas came early this year as couples around the world are now forced to quarantine together. We’re seeing a rise in divorce rates in China from the pandemic, and experts are expecting more to come across the globe.
Relationships are battling stresses outside their typical problems. Now, they have the added weight of remaining healthy and keeping the ones around them safe. Add in the inability to remove yourself from situations, and you’ve got a recipe for disaster. If you’re looking to help speed up the process of ruining your relationship, I’ve got some tips for you. If you want to succeed in a long-lasting, healthy relationship, consider doing the opposite of these suggestions — whether we’re in a pandemic or not.
Question everything they do
Inevitably, there comes a time you and your partner won’t agree on how to do something. More times than not, the difference is simply a personal preference resulting in the same solution. Questioning and battling every decision your partner makes is a sure-fire way to make them resent you. Even if you’re certain they need to know your “much better way”, maybe just don’t.
Play devil’s advocate constantly
In a relationship, being able to challenge your partner’s opinion is essential and healthy. When it comes to big decisions, a valued partner is one who can play devil’s advocate in a way to develop a more reflective response. However, starting your morning with an argument of whether the chicken or the egg came first is the ideal way to self-destruct your relationship.
Don’t give them space
It’s perfectly reasonable to want to spend time with the people you care about. Usually, our individual schedules keep us away from our partners to some degree. When that isn’t an option, it’s necessary to understand space is still needed. If you want to stress your relationship, involve yourself in every part of your partner’s day. Smother them constantly if you really want to heat things up.
Don’t make time for individual activities
This goes hand in hand with the last one. Our usual time alone allows us the opportunity to do things solely for us. Without alone time or the ability to get away from our significant others, we run the risk of losing these precious moments. A quick way to push your relationships to the limits is to include yourself in everything your partner does, from taking a walk to reading a book to everything in between. There’s no “I” in “team”, ya know?
Don’t take time to dream together
Dreaming about your future together shows your partner you see a future with them. It solidifies a foundation of trust and assures them you’re going to stick around. And when you’ve got a whole lot of time on your hands and not much to do, it makes dreaming about what you would do more important than ever. Worrying about what’s happening now and discussing the day passes the time, but dreaming about tomorrow creates a future for your relationship. It establishes goals and promotes progress. Pump the brakes on all of that by removing your partner from your dreams and aspirations.
Don’t appreciate the little things
There’s a lot of big things to worry about — life is full of them. But if you forget to appreciate the little things, you’re only left with the big stuff. Only focusing on big wins and losses leads to appreciating things less often, which leads to a feeling of being unappreciated. Look past all the times your partner went out of there way to make sure you didn’t forget your jacket, the times you found a note left for you just to say hi, and definitely ignore the times they randomly hug you from behind if you want to streamline the failure of your relationship.
These are universal
“Relationships take work” is an understatement. The couples that make it seem easy intentionally avoid the things listed above and then some. They build each other up, respect each other’s space, and grow together — and not only whenever they’re forced to spend all their time with one another. Successful partners work tirelessly to make sure all aspects of the relationship remain relevant. They adapt when needed and keep things that work. But, if you’re looking to go ahead and call your’s quits, the tips above will help send your other half over the edge to make it happen.