There is a reason why classical literature authors put so much attention into the movements of the eyebrows and eyelashes of their characters. Modern researchers have proven that we transfer up to 93% of information non-verbally. By the way, non-verbal communication is not just our body language and mimics, but even the smells and the objects we surround ourselves with.
We have analyzed hundreds of tricks that help us to influence other people without words. We decided to tell you about the 9 most unusual tricks we’ve found.
1. To win someone over, check the eye color of the other person.
This will help you to establish a good connection with a person you don’t know. The time you need to see the color of their eyes is exactly the time you need to make good eye contact. According to psychologists, it should take from 3 to 5 seconds. If you don’t look into their eyes at all, or spend more than 9 seconds looking, they might feel uncomfortable.
Also, smile with your eyes while looking at their nose bridge. This is the center of the social contact area. If you look lower than the nose, it may be taken as an intrusion into their private space, and if you look higher — as an attempt to pressure.
2. Don’t start a conversation with a new person right away — give them some time.
After you’ve established eye contact, don’t start the conversation right away. Take a few seconds to hang your coat, open your bag, move your chair. This will give the person a few extra seconds to figure out their first impression of you. And during the conversation, they won’t lose focus while noticing new things about you, because they’ve already had enough time to have a good look at you.
3. Touching the stem of a glass can indicate attraction.
Psychological experiments show that touching cylindrical objects looks like a sign of attraction. If a girl wants to show to a guy that she’s interested in him, she just needs to touch the stem of her glass. The same will work with a pen, or even a ring she can play with on her finger.
4. Pointing your foot toward someone helps to decrease the social distance.
If your legs are crossed when you are sitting, point at the person you’re interested in with your foot. This gesture decreases the social distance because it looks like an attempt to get closer. This position doesn’t violate the personal space of other people, so it can even be used in business environments.
5. The “OK” gesture helps to show authority without any aggression.
If you need to gain the attention of an audience, but you don’t want to be too aggressive, here’s a little trick. Imagine that you are holding a needle between your thumb and your pointer finger as if you are making the “OK” gesture. During the conversation, try to show the needle to other people. This way, the gestures will appear natural, but you will also draw people’s attention to the important points.
6. If you are bored, use your hands to show it.
If you are not interested in a conversation, but you don’t want to be rude, use your body language to tell the person you’re talking to. Touch your cheek — this will show them you’re not very interested. If they don’t get that hint, put your head on your palm. If that doesn’t help, put your head on your fist. Of course, this is not very polite, but the other person is not being polite either if they still don’t understand that you’re bored.
7. If someone says unpleasant things to you, stare at their forehead.
In order to avoid talking to a toxic person that wants to tell you that they don’t think your new haircut looks good, just stare at their forehead. This look shows power. Even if you don’t feel confident, this simple life hack will help you get the upper hand quickly.
8. In order to take a break during a conversation, do a mechanical gesture.
If you were asked to make a decision, and you need some time to think, start cleaning your glasses. This gesture looks mechanical and the person will most likely decide that you are thinking about the answer and they will wait for it patiently. If you don’t wear glasses, any other regular gesture will do, for example, you can check a button on your shirt or an earring.
9. Stay on the left side if you want to be a leader.
Political scientists found this interesting phenomenon when they were analyzing the PR campaigns of presidential candidates. They noticed that the candidates who were on the left of the photographer (so they ended up on the right side of the photo), made a stronger impression on viewers. Of course, this rule is only true with other things being equal: if someone dominates thanks to their body position or charisma, the position relative to the photographer won’t help.
