After a relationship is over, you might try to ignore your ex, or pretend that it doesn’t bother you. But there are signs that you may have feelings for your ex, and these can trickle over into your new relationship.
Should I Pursue It?
If you’re wondering whether you should pursue it, the truth is, it takes time. If you’ve waited a while and you feel like trying again, then maybe it might work. If you feel you need to forgive your ex in order to bring about closure, then do that. Otherwise, they’re your ex for a reason.
You can have feelings for them while also realizing it isn’t going to work out. If you’re wondering whether you should tell them, the answer is up to you. If you think it’ll help, then do it. If not, learn to get over it.
Of course, it takes time, but if you want to have another relationship in the future you must do this.
So what are the signs that you still have feelings for your ex? Well, read on to find out.
You Think About Them—A Lot
Thinking about your ex is a common thing, but if you can’t stop thinking about them that’s a clear sign you’re not over it.
This oftentimes happens in situations that aren’t fitting either. Sometimes it happens when you’re with someone new. You’re trying to build a new relationship, but you keep thinking about them.
If you’re still letting them live rent-free in your head, that’s a clear sign you’re not over it, and you have some closure to do.
You Want them Around
Usually, when a breakup happens, it’s best if you two spend time apart. There are a lot of feelings, and both of you have to figure out whether it’s right for you or not. But if you still want them around, and you find yourself keeping the false hope that you’ll get back together, that’s a sign that you’re not over it. Chances are, if you still want them around a lot, and not just as a friend, that’s a sign you’ve still got feelings and you need to figure out what to do about those.
Things Remind you of Them More than They Should
There are little things that remind us of our former partners, but if you notice that every rom-com you watch is making you remember your ex, that’s a sign you’re not over it. If you’re reading things and it keeps reminding you of your ex, then chances are you’re not over it.
If you keep thinking about them long after it’s over, then it’s pretty obvious that you’re still not over them and need to look at yourself to figure out what you should do.
The Jealousy Bug
The jealousy bug is a clear sign there are unresolved feelings there. It comes forth in a couple of different ways. For starters, you might get jealous of couples holding hands or spending time together. Even if it isn’t related to you directly, you find yourself getting jealous. That could just be the desire for a new relationship, or maybe you just miss the feelings your ex gave you.
It also shows up in your ex’s new partners. If you ex moved on clearly and is with someone, and you’re upset about that or even a bit jealous, then that’s a clear sign you’re not over them. You need to understand that the inability to move on is an apparent sign that you haven’t moved on, and you’ve got some feelings there.
Unable to Move On
This is another obvious sign. If you try to date others, but you can’t seem to get over those feelings in the past, then guess what? You’re still not over them.
You might tell yourself that you’re over it, that you don’t care, but when you try to pursue any other relationship, you feel disinterest. You sometimes sabotage potential relationships because your ex stole your heart and you still have love for that person even if you haven’t been together in a bit.
You Still Care About What They Think
You might share things with your ex that you normally don’t share with others. They might be the first person you say good news too, or maybe you share things with them even if it’s obvious they don’t really care.
You also wonder if they approve or care about what you do. You still kind of try to get their opinion and agreement on things, even though they’ve been out of the picture for a bit.
If they’re not dating you, you don’t need their approval, but the idea that they do is a clear sign you’re not over it.
Overanalyzing
Finally, you overanalyze everything you did that caused the breakup and wonder where things went wrong.
You start to question why you broke up, and you begin to drive yourself crazy because you can’t find the answer. You think breaking up is wrong, and you can’t stop reading old texts to prove that you meant something, and you reminisce on those texts a lot. You start to think of the possible reason for a breakup.
What Should I do?
- If you come to the realization of “I still love my ex” after this, then it’s time to do some thinking.
- If you think there is a future there, then maybe talk to them.
- If you need to talk to them in order to get closure to move on, please do that. There’s no sense in carrying that baggage after the deed’s been done and you two aren’t a thing anymore.
- If you can’t do that and you need to move on, consider seeing a therapist to help with overcoming the trauma of moving on from your ex. If you can’t reconcile or you feel you shouldn’t, then don’t.
Moving on is very hard, but this article shows you the signs that point out you still love your ex.