One person I know who uses this technique shared the example:
Brush off a passing criticism and diffuse the situation.
6. Remember their brokenness.
A huge help when working with difficult people is to remember that they are likely broken and hurting. That they are probably struggling with something that overflows into their life.
Truth is, hurt people hurt people. If you can remember their hurt, you’re more likely to respond from a place of grace. Try to reconcile and make the situation better, lifting further burden off of them and setting an example of peace.
7. Shower them with kindness.
Few things diffuse a difficult situation like kindness. It’s hard to remain mad at someone who is being incredibly nice in spite of a bad attitude on the other person’s part.
Take the high road and be a fountain of kindness that saturates the moment with the positive rather than the negative. Hopefully, the other person will soften and respond the same way.
8. Take a break.
Advice often given in healthy conflict resolution is the principle of walking away to get some space and perspective. Doing this allows a person to cool down and gather their thoughts and feelings, in the hope of dealing with the conflict in a healthy way.
I’m one of those people who is better fit for conflict with a small break. If you’re the type of person who needs to gather thoughts or cool down before speaking, don’t be afraid to briefly walk away from the situation and come back collected.
9. Pray for the person.
Prayer has this incredible ability of softening our hearts towards others. If you’re at odds with someone, one of the best ways of responding in a healthy and godly way is by praying for them. It’s hard to be mad at someone you are praying for.
10. ALWAYS <emMatthew 18 a conflict.</em
One of the quickest ways of causing division in the body of Christ is by circumventing healthy conflict. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve watched someone go to people and slander somebody instead of talking to the person directly.
If you have a problem with someone, don’t go tell other people. You may feel you have the purest motives in telling an outside party, but that’s not biblical and it’s wrong. Matthew 18 tells you to go to that person if there is a fault; not a boss, not a pastor, and not anyone period. Bringing another into the situation only takes place when you’ve approached the difficult person without resolution and you feel bringing another they trust into the situation might help them turn from sin.
Would you want someone going to others and saying negative things about you? Probably not. So don’t do it to someone else. ALWAYS Matthew 18 a conflict.
